Have you ever wondered why some people are able to have success in dating and relationships, while others struggle and wonder if love will ever come their way? The answer could be found in understanding Love Rules.
The three most important Love Rules to remember are: Stop, Look, and Listen.
Stop.
Stop focusing on what you don't have and bring what you do have into view. You have attributes, talents, and abilities unique to you. Think about what they are and showcase them. The same goes for your appearance. Enhance and appreciate your good features, polish up what you have, and let go of any inner critical remarks that pass negative judgment on you.
Look.
Look at what you do to your self esteem when you act like a judgment machine. Nothing good comes from mean criticism. Find your encouraging voice that cheers you on. Whenever you have a win or do something you are proud of, tell yourself, "Yay team! Way to go!" Put that sentiment in your own words and make it your new mantra.
Listen.
Listening is a gift--to ourselves and to others. Men are deeply attracted to women who are gracious listeners; women warm to a man who can hear what they have to say and respond appropriately. Being a good listener starts with hearing your own judgmental voice first and learning to turn the volume down. When you are kinder to yourself, that caring ripples out to others.
Wrap these three rules in a blanket of a positive attitude. Negativity repels love; a positive attitude attracts who and what you want.
If you notice negative judgments curling up in your mind, wanting and waiting to spring forth, monitor the words and phrases that would give those thoughts a life.
Stop, Look, and Listen. Love Rules.
Saturday, March 14, 2009
The 6 Relationship Stages
If you have been in a few relationships you probably already noticed that there are several stages a relationship goes through before it ends. Most of these relationships begin great, and then end sometimes badly. The following list of relationship stages will help you determine where your current relationship is, and hopefully stop it from where it might be going.
The Beginning: This is always fun. You meet the person for the first time and start spending time together. You get butterflies in your stomach when they are around.
The Bonding: Commitment often begins here. You decide to stay with this person and see where things lead. Love may be present.
The Comfort: The fire has left and has been replaced with a warm comfort for one another. Routines are usually established at this stage.
The Boredom: The relationship becomes boring and you might be bored of each other. You may begin fighting about things that you do not really care about.
The Avoiding: Avoiding each other completely has become normal in your relationship. The only reason you stay together is because of convenience.
The End: The last of all the relationship stages. You may have tried several things to save the relationship but it was too late. You split up.
If many of your relationships have followed this path in the past, you may want to learn how to fix it before it happens. Michael Webb, who is the author of the Relationship EBook Collection, can teach you the skills you need to know if you want to avoid this nasty and painful cycle in the future. If you really want to make a relationship last it is going to take a lot of work. But it will be totally worth it.
By Martin Bowditch
The Beginning: This is always fun. You meet the person for the first time and start spending time together. You get butterflies in your stomach when they are around.
The Bonding: Commitment often begins here. You decide to stay with this person and see where things lead. Love may be present.
The Comfort: The fire has left and has been replaced with a warm comfort for one another. Routines are usually established at this stage.
The Boredom: The relationship becomes boring and you might be bored of each other. You may begin fighting about things that you do not really care about.
The Avoiding: Avoiding each other completely has become normal in your relationship. The only reason you stay together is because of convenience.
The End: The last of all the relationship stages. You may have tried several things to save the relationship but it was too late. You split up.
If many of your relationships have followed this path in the past, you may want to learn how to fix it before it happens. Michael Webb, who is the author of the Relationship EBook Collection, can teach you the skills you need to know if you want to avoid this nasty and painful cycle in the future. If you really want to make a relationship last it is going to take a lot of work. But it will be totally worth it.
By Martin Bowditch
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Words That Should Exist
ACCORDIONATED (ah kor' de on ay tid) -- adj. Being able to drive and read a road map at the same time.
AQUADEXTROUS (ak wa deks' trus) -- adj. Possessing the ability to turn the bathtub faucet on and off with your toes.
AQUALIBRIUM (ak wa lib' re um) -- n. The point where the stream of drinking fountain water is at its perfect height, thus relieving the drinker from (a) having to suck the nozzle, or (b) squirting himself in the eye (or ear).
BURGACIDE (burg' uh side) -- n. When a hamburger can't take any more torture and hurls itself through the grill into the coals.
BUZZACKS (buz' aks) -- n. People in phone marts who walk around picking up display phones and listening for dial tones even when they know the phones are not connected.
CARPERPETUATION (kar' pur pet u a shun) -- n. The act, when vacuuming, of running over a string or a piece of lint at least a dozen times, reaching over and picking it up, examining it, then putting it back down to give the vacuum one more chance.
DIMP (dimp) -- n. A person who insults you in a cheap department store by asking, "Do you work here?"
DISCONFECT (dis kon fekt') -- v. To sterilize the piece of candy you dropped on the floor by blowing on it, somehow assuming this will `remove' all the germs.
ECNALUBMA (ek na lub' ma) -- n. A rescue vehicle which can only be seen in the rearview mirror.
EIFFELITES (eye' ful eyetz) -- n. Gangly people sitting in front of you at the movies who, no matter what direction you lean in, follow suit.
ELBONICS (el bon' iks) -- n. The actions of two people maneuvering for one armrest in a movie theater.
ELECELLERATION (el a cel er ay' shun) -- n. The mistaken notion that the more you press an elevator button the faster it will arrive.
FRUST (frust) -- n. The small line of debris that refuses to be swept onto the dust pan and keeps backing a person across the room until he finally decides to give up and sweep it under the rug.
LACTOMANGULATION (lak' to man gyu lay' shun) -- n. Manhandling the "open here" spout on a milk container so badly that one has to resort to the `illegal' side.
NEONPHANCY (ne on' fan see) -- n. A fluorescent light bulb struggling to come to life.
PEPPIER (pehp ee ay') -- n. The waiter at a fancy restaurant whose sole purpose seems to be walking around asking diners if they want ground pepper.
PETROPHOBIC (pet ro fob' ik) -- adj. One who is embarrassed to undress in front of a household pet.
PHONESIA (fo nee' zhuh) -- n. The affliction of dialing a phone number and forgetting whom you were calling just as they answer.
PUPKUS (pup' kus) -- n. The moist residue left on a window after a dog presses its nose to it.
TELECRASTINATION (tel e kras tin ay' shun) -- n. The act of always letting the phone ring at least twice before you pick it up, even when you're only six inches away.
AQUADEXTROUS (ak wa deks' trus) -- adj. Possessing the ability to turn the bathtub faucet on and off with your toes.
AQUALIBRIUM (ak wa lib' re um) -- n. The point where the stream of drinking fountain water is at its perfect height, thus relieving the drinker from (a) having to suck the nozzle, or (b) squirting himself in the eye (or ear).
BURGACIDE (burg' uh side) -- n. When a hamburger can't take any more torture and hurls itself through the grill into the coals.
BUZZACKS (buz' aks) -- n. People in phone marts who walk around picking up display phones and listening for dial tones even when they know the phones are not connected.
CARPERPETUATION (kar' pur pet u a shun) -- n. The act, when vacuuming, of running over a string or a piece of lint at least a dozen times, reaching over and picking it up, examining it, then putting it back down to give the vacuum one more chance.
DIMP (dimp) -- n. A person who insults you in a cheap department store by asking, "Do you work here?"
DISCONFECT (dis kon fekt') -- v. To sterilize the piece of candy you dropped on the floor by blowing on it, somehow assuming this will `remove' all the germs.
ECNALUBMA (ek na lub' ma) -- n. A rescue vehicle which can only be seen in the rearview mirror.
EIFFELITES (eye' ful eyetz) -- n. Gangly people sitting in front of you at the movies who, no matter what direction you lean in, follow suit.
ELBONICS (el bon' iks) -- n. The actions of two people maneuvering for one armrest in a movie theater.
ELECELLERATION (el a cel er ay' shun) -- n. The mistaken notion that the more you press an elevator button the faster it will arrive.
FRUST (frust) -- n. The small line of debris that refuses to be swept onto the dust pan and keeps backing a person across the room until he finally decides to give up and sweep it under the rug.
LACTOMANGULATION (lak' to man gyu lay' shun) -- n. Manhandling the "open here" spout on a milk container so badly that one has to resort to the `illegal' side.
NEONPHANCY (ne on' fan see) -- n. A fluorescent light bulb struggling to come to life.
PEPPIER (pehp ee ay') -- n. The waiter at a fancy restaurant whose sole purpose seems to be walking around asking diners if they want ground pepper.
PETROPHOBIC (pet ro fob' ik) -- adj. One who is embarrassed to undress in front of a household pet.
PHONESIA (fo nee' zhuh) -- n. The affliction of dialing a phone number and forgetting whom you were calling just as they answer.
PUPKUS (pup' kus) -- n. The moist residue left on a window after a dog presses its nose to it.
TELECRASTINATION (tel e kras tin ay' shun) -- n. The act of always letting the phone ring at least twice before you pick it up, even when you're only six inches away.
Things You Don't Want to Hear During Surgery
"Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy."
"Bo! Bo! Come back with that! Bad Dog!"
"Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?"
"Hand me that ... uh ... that uh..... thingie"
"Oh no! I just lost my Rolex."
"Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?"
"There go the lights again..."
"Ya know, there's big money in kidneys.. and this guy's got two of'em."
"Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!"
"Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing my concentration off."
"What's this doing here?"
"Someone call the janitor, we have a BIG mess again."
"I hate it when they're missing stuff in here."
"Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness"
"That's cool! Now can you make his leg twitch?!"
"Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us."
"Sterile, shcmedle. The floor's clean, right?"
"What do you mean he wasn't in for a sex change..."
"OK, now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature."
"This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?"
"Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card?"
"Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough."
"What do you mean "You want a divorce"!"
"FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out!"
"Oh no! Page 47 of the manual is missing!"
"...And now we place the ape's brain in the subject's body."
"You forgot what he was in for? Oh well, let's surprise him."
"Bo! Bo! Come back with that! Bad Dog!"
"Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?"
"Hand me that ... uh ... that uh..... thingie"
"Oh no! I just lost my Rolex."
"Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?"
"There go the lights again..."
"Ya know, there's big money in kidneys.. and this guy's got two of'em."
"Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!"
"Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing my concentration off."
"What's this doing here?"
"Someone call the janitor, we have a BIG mess again."
"I hate it when they're missing stuff in here."
"Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness"
"That's cool! Now can you make his leg twitch?!"
"Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us."
"Sterile, shcmedle. The floor's clean, right?"
"What do you mean he wasn't in for a sex change..."
"OK, now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature."
"This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?"
"Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card?"
"Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough."
"What do you mean "You want a divorce"!"
"FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out!"
"Oh no! Page 47 of the manual is missing!"
"...And now we place the ape's brain in the subject's body."
"You forgot what he was in for? Oh well, let's surprise him."
Parable of the Pencil
The Pencil Maker took the pencil aside, just before putting him into the box. There are 5 things you need to know, he told the pencil, before I send you out into the world. Always remember them and never forget, and you will become the best pencil you can be.
One: You will be able to do many great things, but only if you allow yourself to be held in Someone's hand.
Two: You will experience a painful sharpening from time to time, but you'll need it to become a better pencil.
Three: You will be able to correct mistakes you will make.
Four: The most important part of you will always be what's inside.
And Five: On every surface you are used on, you must leave your mark. No matter what the condition, you must continue to write.
The pencil understood and promised to remember, and went into the box with purpose in its heart.
Now replacing the place of the pencil with you; always remember them and never forget, and you will become the best person you can be.
One: You will be able to do many great things, but only if you allow yourself to be held in God's hand. And allow other human beings to access you for the many gifts you possess.
Two: You will experience a painful sharpening from time to time, by going through various problems, but you'll need it to become a stronger person.
Three: You will be able to correct mistakes you might make or grow through them.
Four: The most important part of you will always be what's on the inside.
And Five: On every surface you walk, you must leave your mark. No matter what the situation, you must continue to serve God in everything.
By understanding and remembering, let us proceed with our life on this earth having a meaningful purpose in our heart and a relationship with God daily.
-- Author Unknown
One: You will be able to do many great things, but only if you allow yourself to be held in Someone's hand.
Two: You will experience a painful sharpening from time to time, but you'll need it to become a better pencil.
Three: You will be able to correct mistakes you will make.
Four: The most important part of you will always be what's inside.
And Five: On every surface you are used on, you must leave your mark. No matter what the condition, you must continue to write.
The pencil understood and promised to remember, and went into the box with purpose in its heart.
Now replacing the place of the pencil with you; always remember them and never forget, and you will become the best person you can be.
One: You will be able to do many great things, but only if you allow yourself to be held in God's hand. And allow other human beings to access you for the many gifts you possess.
Two: You will experience a painful sharpening from time to time, by going through various problems, but you'll need it to become a stronger person.
Three: You will be able to correct mistakes you might make or grow through them.
Four: The most important part of you will always be what's on the inside.
And Five: On every surface you walk, you must leave your mark. No matter what the situation, you must continue to serve God in everything.
By understanding and remembering, let us proceed with our life on this earth having a meaningful purpose in our heart and a relationship with God daily.
-- Author Unknown
Sunday, March 8, 2009
Where is My Relationship Heading?
Have you ever asked yourself, Where is this relationship heading? It's a good practice to assess where you are in your life from time to time. Where you are, that is, in relation to what is going on in all the various aspects of what makes up your life experience.
Today let's focus on your relationships. Are the people with whom you surround yourself in life helping you grow or are they hindering your growth? It may be that you are the one who is changing or have changed, and with every personal growth spurt or boost of expanded awareness you experience, you need to reassess your relationships accordingly. Or your partner may be growing, but in a different direction from you; same outcome really.
Most of us regularly assess acquaintances and business associates, but do you take time to assess your close personal friendships and intimate relationship, to assess if they are still serving your highest good and personal growth?
Of course we may be walking where angels fear to tread here, but if you are not advancing in your life, if you are not growing and expanding your possibilities of greater awareness and experience, you are missing out on a major part of what life is meant to be: a journey of expansion of your being into more than you are at present.
Every relationship has its own potential and they fall into one of two basic categories:
1. Relationships that add.
2. Relationships that subtract.
Take a look at the second category. What happens when you become aware that one or more of your relationships is subtracting from your personal growth and progress in life? You are left with the option to resist this realization or you can bring truth to it and simply accept that it is "not working" and assess what you can do about it.
So what does this mean for you? Good question...
It means one of three things:
1. The relationship was meant to be temporary and now needs to end.
You created this relationship to learn something and it has brought that specific gift to your life. The worst thing to do is to hold onto it when the universe is telling you it's time to let go. If you hold on to this kind of relationship it will pull you down and prevent your expansion. This relationship was only ever meant to be "seasonal," and if you don't let it go, what was once delightful could become destructive; certainly not for your greater continued good.
2. You entered the relationship thinking you could change the other person.
The only reality over which you have any kind of control is your own experience. You can never change anyone else unless they decide to make the change of their own accord. If you think you will change a person to fit your needs you are misleading yourself. They must want to change, and you can't want it more for them than they want it for themselves. If this is where you stand in relation to the other person, you need to reassess and take action.
3. You are in a static relationship that holds you in your past.
As long as you surround yourself with a person or people who hold you in your past it will prevent you from completing your transformation into who you want to become. When others attempt to put you on a guilt trip for trying to change, their fear of change will hold you bound to the past and prevent your growth. As long as they attempt to hold you in the same place they are, you cannot move forward at your own chosen pace.
If your intimate relationship falls into one of the above categories, you will have to assess just exactly what are your priorities for your life. You can ramp it up or choose to let it go. It takes enormous courage to leave the past behind and face an uncertain future, but the price of not doing so may cost you far more than anything you could possibly lose.
You were born to live your life in ever expanding experience. You need to surround yourself with people who share your highest aspirations. Mix with those who are as you would like to be, or who have what you want - not what you have at present.
When you feel the urge, take time to reassess your relationships, particularly your intimate relationship. See how you can perhaps contribute more, be more present to the other and play your role with full immersion. If you see it cannot be sustained, do what needs to be done. You only have one life this time around. Don't waste even one day more: start living for growth of love and expansion of who you are and want to be.
By Marie C. Barrett
Today let's focus on your relationships. Are the people with whom you surround yourself in life helping you grow or are they hindering your growth? It may be that you are the one who is changing or have changed, and with every personal growth spurt or boost of expanded awareness you experience, you need to reassess your relationships accordingly. Or your partner may be growing, but in a different direction from you; same outcome really.
Most of us regularly assess acquaintances and business associates, but do you take time to assess your close personal friendships and intimate relationship, to assess if they are still serving your highest good and personal growth?
Of course we may be walking where angels fear to tread here, but if you are not advancing in your life, if you are not growing and expanding your possibilities of greater awareness and experience, you are missing out on a major part of what life is meant to be: a journey of expansion of your being into more than you are at present.
Every relationship has its own potential and they fall into one of two basic categories:
1. Relationships that add.
2. Relationships that subtract.
Take a look at the second category. What happens when you become aware that one or more of your relationships is subtracting from your personal growth and progress in life? You are left with the option to resist this realization or you can bring truth to it and simply accept that it is "not working" and assess what you can do about it.
So what does this mean for you? Good question...
It means one of three things:
1. The relationship was meant to be temporary and now needs to end.
You created this relationship to learn something and it has brought that specific gift to your life. The worst thing to do is to hold onto it when the universe is telling you it's time to let go. If you hold on to this kind of relationship it will pull you down and prevent your expansion. This relationship was only ever meant to be "seasonal," and if you don't let it go, what was once delightful could become destructive; certainly not for your greater continued good.
2. You entered the relationship thinking you could change the other person.
The only reality over which you have any kind of control is your own experience. You can never change anyone else unless they decide to make the change of their own accord. If you think you will change a person to fit your needs you are misleading yourself. They must want to change, and you can't want it more for them than they want it for themselves. If this is where you stand in relation to the other person, you need to reassess and take action.
3. You are in a static relationship that holds you in your past.
As long as you surround yourself with a person or people who hold you in your past it will prevent you from completing your transformation into who you want to become. When others attempt to put you on a guilt trip for trying to change, their fear of change will hold you bound to the past and prevent your growth. As long as they attempt to hold you in the same place they are, you cannot move forward at your own chosen pace.
If your intimate relationship falls into one of the above categories, you will have to assess just exactly what are your priorities for your life. You can ramp it up or choose to let it go. It takes enormous courage to leave the past behind and face an uncertain future, but the price of not doing so may cost you far more than anything you could possibly lose.
You were born to live your life in ever expanding experience. You need to surround yourself with people who share your highest aspirations. Mix with those who are as you would like to be, or who have what you want - not what you have at present.
When you feel the urge, take time to reassess your relationships, particularly your intimate relationship. See how you can perhaps contribute more, be more present to the other and play your role with full immersion. If you see it cannot be sustained, do what needs to be done. You only have one life this time around. Don't waste even one day more: start living for growth of love and expansion of who you are and want to be.
By Marie C. Barrett
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